The blond starts crying to her husband, sobbing, “That’s horrible so many men dying
that way!”

Confused, he said, “Yes dear, it is sad, but they were
skydiving and there is always that risk involved.”

After a few minutes
the blond, still sobbing asks, “How many is a Brazilian?”

Thanks to dennistruckdriver from MLP forums for this

A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money, decided to hire herself
out as a handy-woman and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do
neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.

“Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch,” he said.
“How much will you charge me?” The blonde quickly responded, “How about $50?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and everything she would need was in the garage.

The man’s wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, “Does she realize that our porch goes all the way around the house?” He responded, “That’s a bit cynical, isn’t it?” The wife replied, “You’re right. I guess I’m starting to believe all Those blonde jokes we’ve been getting by e-mail lately.”

A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
“You’re finished already?” the husband asked. “Yes,” the blonde
Replied, and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats.”

Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50.00 and handed it to her.

“And by the way,” the blonde added, “it’s not a Porch, it’s a Lexus.”

He shouldn’t have trusted her…